No Empty Chairs: Missing him

Sunday, December 27, 2009

Missing him

Nothing new...just missing him. It's amazing to me how it can hit me and hit me so hard. I have moments when I think I just might make it through this and then the grief hits me and I'm left crying like it was the day he left us. It's just plain hard this roller coaster of emotions that I'm sentenced to. I feel like I'm saying the same stuff over and over again...which I am. That is the world of grief...and it's no fun!

This Christmas season has been a good one for the most part. We have had many good and memorable moments as a family and I really enjoyed things I didn't think I ever would again but it has hit me the last couple of days and my arms just ache...ache to have my Wyatt here with me. I just miss him and there is nothing that can be done. I wish so badly I didn't have to know this pain, this longing and this ache. It's truly the worst! I have many pictures to post and many memorable moments to add but for tonight I just want to add a couple of pictures of him because I MISS him! Love you Wyatt!

Christmas two years ago.

Wyatt as baby Jesus.

Random picture Tyler took.

5 comments:

Eileen said...: I'm so sorry. I wish I had some words of comfort, but I don't. A "Mother's love" is a very special gift, and how blessed Wyatt is to have your love.

I've said it before, but I am very impressed with the many beautiful pictures you have of your little angel.; December 27, 2009 at 10:01 AM
larsen family said...: Thinking of you! I want you to know I think you are such a special lady. I admire you.
Love Ya,
Jen Angel Kamber's mommy; December 27, 2009 at 10:33 AM
Gedge's said...: Hey.. hoping your feeling better. I know that arm "aching" feeling. You are such a brave woman. Thanks so much for posting how you feel!

Ps I love the first pic of Wyatt. The little arm stretch is so cute!; December 27, 2009 at 6:33 PM
Jill said...: I wish I had something comforting to say...know that I'm here, always. Love you.; December 28, 2009 at 9:04 AM
Larsen said...: You are not alone. I've been missing my Gavibear so much recently. Maybe that's one of the reasons I haven't been posting. I have all these thoughts in my head, that are not exactly uplifting, so I might as well not say anything, but then they stay stuck in my head. Oh, the circles that we run. Thinking of you.

Michelle
Gavin's Mom; December 28, 2009 at 7:43 PM

Post a Comment

Wyatt

Wyatt had a little cold the weekend before he passed away. We took him into the Dr's thinking he might have RSV at the worst. The Dr. admitted him to the hospital and they took a chest x-ray. That's when we found out he had an enlarged heart caused by a virus. There was no indication before this that he had any problems. He was healthy and happy. He needed to be life flighted to Primary Children's Hospital. When they put the breathing tube in, Wyatt went into cardiac arrest. The CPR caused brain damage. He never woke up after that. They were able to stabalize him enough to make it to primary childrens. We had to take him off life support 3 days later. He left this earth peacefully in the arms of his parents. We know we will have our little boy again someday. What a glorious day that will be!

Michelle's list(Angel James' mom)

When Someone you Love is Bereaved

I know a lot of people just "don't know what to say/do" so they don't do anything. Not doing anything is the wrong answer. Hopefully this list can help you help the ones you love in their journey of Grief.

1. First and foremost TALK about the loved one who's passed. Even if it uncomfortable at first, it will become easier.

2. If you didn't know the person at all or very well, ask to hear about them and learn of them through stories.

3. Don't ever put a time line on someone's grief.

4. Saying things like, "They are in a better place." Really isn't comforting. It makes the bereaved feel like the place they had with them wasn't good.

5. If you don't know what to say, just say, "I'm So sorry you have to go through this."

6. If the person needs to analyze the circumstances surrounding the death, let them just talk and rehash anything as many times as they need to.

7. Don't assume they are ever "better." It never gets better and will be a part of them for the rest of their lives.

8. Don't underestimate how frazzled, abscent minded & spacey grief can make you.

9. Pamper them if you have means. Retail Therapy worked great for me! So did pedicures and getting my hair done, I felt awful on the inside, at least I could try to feel good about me on the outside.

10. Love notes. Emails. Thinking of You cards. Thinking of the bereaved person cards.

11. Do not, I stress Do not get offended if your loved one doesn't answer his/her phone or return your calls. Don't assume that they don't appreciate your effort. It's just that someone bereaved doesn't want to put on a "happy voice." and burden everyone with their grief.

12. Most bereaved people will not offer information on how they are doing unless they truly feel like you want to know.

13. Validate.Validate.Validate. Please whatever you do, don't compare your loved ones loss to someone elses' "harder loss". Every loss is hard. Comparing makes the person feel like they shouldn't struggle because it could be worse.

14. The comment "but aren't you grateful you know you see them again" isn't comforting. It is not a fix all. It is comforting, but it doesn't take the pain out of not having them now.

15. Just make sure they know you love them. Be a shoulder to cry on.

Why?

Joseph Smith said:
"I have meditated upon the subject, and asked the question, why is it that infants, innocent children, are taken away from us, especially those that seem to be the most intelligent and interesting. the strongest reasons that present themselves to my mind are these.....The Lord takes many away, even in infancy that they may escape the envy of man, and the sorrows and evils of this present world; they were too pure, too lovely to live on earth; therefore, if rightly considered, instead of mourning we have reason to rejoice as they are delivered from evil, and we shall soon have them again....The only difference between the old and the young dying is, one lives longer in heaven and eternal light and glory then the other, and is freed a little sooner from this miserable, wicked world. Not withstanding all this glory we for a moment lose sight of it, and mourn the loss, but we do not mourn as those without hope."

Sunday, December 27, 2009

Missing him

5 comments:

Wyatt

"No Empty Chairs"

Wyatt's bench

Some Posts from the Past

Instagram

Blog Archive

Popular Posts

Search This Blog

Wyatt's name in the sand

A good grief

Compensation

St. George Condo Rental

Michelle's list(Angel James' mom)

OUR BELIEFS:

"We are a Forever Family"

About Me

Why?

Inspiration

Food Blogs

Photography

Friends and Family

Angel Friends

FEEDJIT Live Traffic Feed

FEEDJIT Live Traffic Map