"Wyatt's Room--Part 2"

A couple of months ago I did a post about Wyatt's room. I commented about how I was wanting a chair in his room to make it kind of a reading room. Well, thanks to the Hansen's we have the most perfect chair. Derek's been remodeling their condo and when I saw this chair I told Derek that is exactly what I wanted for Wyatt's room. It was just like the one in Pottery Barn that I had been trying to save money for. The Hansen's decided to get a different chair so Derek asked if he could buy it for me. Instead they decided to give it to us. I have such gratitude in my heart for their generosity towards us. It's exactly what I've wanted for such a long time.

Of course his room is not how I want it. I want his crib and changing table still in there but since that is not how it's going to be this is the second best. I got a couple of blankets of Wyatt's out of his chest to put on the chair which helps me feel closer to him. Another great plus is it has a hide away bed in it. At first we were going to make Wyatt's room into Hayley's and Emily's room but their beds didn't fit. I'm so glad now that we didn't. If they need to sleep upstairs we now have a bed for them.

I was the only one spending much time in Wyatt's room before the chair. I would sit on the floor and read or cry or just think about my Wyatt. Now I have a comfortable spot to do those things and now the kids are in there with me.We now read our nightly story in his room and it just feels good spending so much time in there with his pictures and things so close by. It's the peaceful quiet room I've wanted. One in which I will spend a lot of time reading--gaining the comfort I seek from wonderful words of wisdom.

Yesterday I put together a poster in memory of Wyatt. It was hard. A lot harder than I thought. The group I joined--Intermoutain Healing Hearts is having a fun/run on September 6th to raise money and awareness about CHD. They are going to honor those that have died with a poster. If anyone that lives in Utah County and would be interested in participating in the run or contributing click here for more information. It's was weird as I was putting these pictures of Wyatt on the poster the thought kept coming to me--Is he really gone? Then reality hits--yes he is. I had bought 4 big scrapbooks for Wyatt right before he passed away. The reality hits me each time I see them that I won't be filling them up with pictures of him playing baseball or basketball or with holiday's and family gatherings. It is just so hard.

I decided when I started this blog that I wasn't going to sugar coat things. It's a struggle everyday not having Wyatt with me. That's the reality. I'm not going to say I've moved on and everything is great because it isn't. I'm having moments here and there where I feel like I might make it through this and I'm grateful for that. I can see some improvement but it's still hard. "The only way out is through." With that said I also have to point out the fact that I cleave to the hope Jesus Christ gives me. Though I mourn I don't mourn without hope. I will have my Wyatt again and each day is that much closer to that glorious, wonderful most awesome day.