One year ago

I knew it would be hard to get back from vacation but I didn't realize how hard it would be. I was able to put the grief away for a bit but it was waiting for me when I got home. I guess being away from my kids and returning made Wyatt's absence even more profound for me. It was a sweet reunion as we hugged each other. But there was something missing...Wyatt. It will be a glorious day when we are all together again as a family. As we were sitting around at the bar eating lunch on Saturday the empty bar stool where Wyatt should be stood out more than it ever has.

Yesterday was an especially hard day. 7 months since Wyatt passed away. Also, a year ago yesterday was Wyatt's baby blessing and Emily's baptism. I hadn't remembered that it was on the 13th of last year until Emily pointed that out to me. Little did I know a year ago that I would only have 5 more months with my baby. I found the journal page I had made for Wyatt's scrapbook it was exactly a year ago today that I wrote this. I've taken out what I had remembered about his blessing but included everything else. Looking back at a year ago I had not idea in the world that he wouldn't be here and that I would be mourning his absence. Oh, it's just so hard.

October 14, 2007

You were born on Friday, September 21st at 7:42am. Your mom and dad were thrilled to have you here. Your older brother and sisters were extremely excited to finally meet you. You weighed 6 lbs. 14 oz. and was 20 1/2 inches long. You had a little trouble breathing the first few hours and you were on oxygen to help you breath but you were soon able to breath on your own.
You are truly a gift from heaven! You are absolutely perfect. Your mom fell in love with you the second she saw you. You are a cherished gift from our Heavenly Father. You have brought such incredible happiness and joy to our family and we feel so blessed to have you as part of our family. You seem so small to us and we are enjoying just holding and looking at your tiny features. You are held all the time with your brother, sisters and parents constantly enjoying you.
Yesterday you were given a name and a blessing by your dad. It was an extra special day because your sister Emily was baptized at the same time. Your dad gave you such a neat blessing. Your grandparents, aunts and uncles and cousins were there to enjoy this special occasion. You were passed around all day with everyone enjoying you. It was an absolutely beautiful day with incredible weather, wonderful friends and family.
Wyatt we are so grateful to have you in our life. You are so much fun! We are cherishing every little thing you do. We love you so much and are so grateful that you are part of our life. You are truly a gift from Heaven!

October 14, 2008

Oh, how we miss the joy you brought to our family. The completeness we felt and the happiness that radiated in our home. You are missed every second of the day and night. Oh, how we look forward to the day with hope and joy when you are in our arms again. You are now a gift in heaven waiting for each of us to return. How we anticipate enjoying you once again. We miss and love you Wyatt!