Sunday, October 21, 2012

How to Help Someone that is Grieving

I'm taking in each and every butterfly that comes to our backyard.  There have been soooo many the past few weeks.  I think Wyatt is giving me as much as he can before they are gone for a few months.  Every time I look out in our backyard there is a white butterfly flying around especially in his garden.  Today I decided to take a few pictures of the flowers in our backyard and this butterfly/moth??? was on the flower.  Such a tender mercy!  So grateful for those tender mercies.

In our community this weekend we had a tragedy occur.  A 15 year old young women was killed in a sand dune accident.  My heart instantly started to ache for the parents and family of this girl when I heard the news.  She is my son Ty's age and is and has been in many of his classes at school. It's heartbreaking!  Such a bright and smart girl...it just doesn't seem right.  I instantly started to ache for the mother of this daughter even though I do not know her.  I hate to see another mother in the club I am in.  It's so hard. 

When something like this happens I will often have people ask me what you should do or say.  I have a few suggestions on my sidebar that are great from a fellow angel mom but I recently found another angel mom that did a long post on this and it was wonderful. "How to help someone that is Grieving" is the title to her post.  Here is the link if you are interested in reading it.  She is in the thick of grief right now and I ache for her as well.  Her little Charlie is just adorable.  Such a sad, sad story.  Each person is different in the way they handle grief but I think these suggestions are a great start in helping someone who is starting on this hard road.  A few book suggestions that I would recommend would be "Tear Soup", "Jesus Wept" and "The Message." 

 I will admit that as time has gone on it has gotten easier but it will never go away. There will continue to be moments of grief, sadness and longing.   I love what Elder Bowen said:
"“How long did it take you to get over it?” The truth is, you will never completely get over it until you are together once again with your departed loved ones. I will never have a fulness of joy until we are reunited in the morning of the First Resurrection.
Wouldn’t it be tragic if we didn’t feel great sorrow when we lose a child? How grateful I am to my Father in Heaven that He allows us to love deeply and love eternally." 

  I love those words...so true!  I can not wait until the morning of the First Resurrection because THEN my joy will be FULL!  We are so grateful for the deep love we have for our sweet Wyatt and are also grateful that our love is ETERNAL.

My heart aches for the Webb family and hope and pray they will feel moments of comfort and love from their Heavenly Father but also from their beautiful daughter.

3 comments:

Teea Lamb said...

That is so sad! It turns out her dad, Adam, works for the same company I do. They sent out an email about it today. It breaks my heart. No one should have to go through this. :(

Bridget said...

So true. It would be tragic to not feel the pain with the loss of a child. Thank you for sharing your tender mercy and about Ty's classmate. It's amazing how many conflicting emotions can be wrapped up into one experience.

Liz said...

I loved that talk too. Doesn't it make you feel so close to our church leaders when they too, these men of such faith, strength and knowledge, are able to express their grief for the loss of their child? I mean so many people have the attitude of, "aren't you over that already?", and here is this amazing priesthood holder confirming that you will never completely get over it? I have pittied those people who do not have the ability to love as deeply as I loved my precious grandson- now there lies the true tragedy.
Thank you for you words and your continued faith.