Wyatt's angel day

Tomorrow is Wyatt's 4th angel day.  I truly can't believe it's been 4 years since I held him in my arms.  Has time healed my heart?  No I still have a huge hole there but time has made everyday living a little easier.  Last week I was on facebook and saw a video from our church about death and on it had some parents talking about their children that had died and how they were grateful for the knowledge of the gospel and how we can be together forever.  I totally agreed with everything that was said.  So grateful for that knowledge and for my Savior and the hope and help he gives me.  My favorite part though was at the end when a father was talking about how yes they are grateful for the gospel but that he still longs everyday to hold his little girl, to give her a hug and to kiss her little forehead.  That is exactly how I feel. I will feel that way the rest of my life.  Time does not take away that longing. Lately I've felt that deep longing more intense and it's been hard. I have added this video to the end of this post.

Yesterday at church we sat behind a little boy that looked a lot like Wyatt.  About the same age as Wyatt before he died.  Does that get any easier?  No, it's still just as hard or harder.  He was chewing on his thumb just the same way as Wyatt did.  His little fingers made my heart ache and I held back the tears.  I miss him, plain and simple I miss him and long to hold him again. 

Today is the start of our spring break.  It's beautiful here with all the blossoms out just like the day we buried our little boy.  We are not going anywhere but staying home for spring break.  We will be releasing butterflies at Wyatt's grave tomorrow as we do each year.  This year we have his bench thanks to so many wonderful friends and family.  We are so grateful for that!  We will spend time as a family enjoying each other and remembering the fun times we had with Wyatt.  I truly look forward to the day when my heart will be complete again, when Wyatt will be in my arms.

Chewing on his thumb.

If you watch this video you will want to go to my sidebar and pause the music.